Moll Flanders

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I said some very tender, kind things in the letter about his
son, which I told him he knew to be my own child, and that
as I was guilty of nothing in marrying him, any more than he
was in marrying me, neither of us having then known our
being at all related to one another, so I hoped he would allow
me the most passionate desire of once seeing my one and only
child, and of showing something of the infirmities of a mother
in preserving a violent affect for him, who had never been
able to retain any thought of me one way or other.

I did believe that, having received this letter, he would
immediately give it to his son to read, I having understood
his eyesbeing so dim, that he could not see to read it; but it
fell out better than so, for as his sight was dim, so he had
allowed his son to open all letters that came to his hand for
him, and the old gentleman being from home, or out of the
way when my messenger came, my letter came directly to my
son's hand, and he opened and read it.

He called the messenger in, after some little stay, and asked
him where the person was who gave him the letter. The
messengertold him the place, which was about seven miles
off, so he bid him stay, and ordering a horse to be got ready,
and two servants, away he came to me with the messenger.
Let any one judge the consternation I was in when my
messenger came back, and told me the old gentleman was not
at home, but his son was come along with him, and was just
coming up to me. I was perfectly confounded, for I knew not
whether it was peace or war, nor could I tell how to behave;
however, I had but a very few moments to think, for my son
was at the heels of the messenger, and coming up into my
lodgings, asked the fellow at the door something. I suppose
it was, for I did not hear it so as to understand it, which was
the gentlewoman that sent him; for the messenger said, 'There
she is, sir'; at which he comes directly up to me, kisses me,
took me in his arms, and embraced me with so much passion
that he could not speak, but I could feel his breast heave and
throb like a child, that cries, but sobs, and cannot cry it out.

I can neither express nor describe the joy that touched my very
soul when I found, for it was easy to discover that part, that
he came not as a stranger, but as a son to a mother, and indeed
as a son who had never before known what a mother of his
own was; in short, we cried over one another a considerable
while, when at last he broke out first. 'My dear mother,' says
he, 'are you still alive? I never expected to have seen your
face.' As for me, I could say nothing a great while.

After we had both recovered ourselves a little, and were able
to talk, he told me how things stood. As to what I had written
to his father, he told me he had not showed my letter to his
father, or told him anything about it; that what his grandmother
left me was in his hands, and that he would do me justice to
my full satisfaction; that as to his father, he was old and infirm
both in body and mind; that he was very fretful and passionate,
almost blind, and capable of nothing; and he questioned
whether he would know how to act in an affair which was of
so nice a nature as this; and that therefore he had come himself,
as well to satisfy himself in seeing me, which he could not
restrain himself from, as also to put it into my power to make
a judgment, after I had seen how things were, whether I would
discover myself to his father or no.

This was really so prudently and wisely managed, that I found
my son was a man of sense, and needed no direction from me.
I told him I did not wonder that his father was as he had
described him, for that his head was a little touched before I
went away; and principally his disturbance was because I
could not be persuaded to conceal our relation and to live with
him as myhusband, after I knew that he was my brother; that
as he knew better than I what his father's present condition
was, I should readily join with him in such measure as he
would direct; that I was indifferent as to seeing his father,
since I had seen him first, and he could not have told me better
news than to tell me that what his grandmother had left me
was entrusted in his hands, who, I doubted not, now he knew
who I was, would, as he said, do me justice. I inquired then
how long my mother had been dead, and where she died, and
told so many particulars of the family, that I left him no room
to doubt the truth of my being really and truly his mother.

My son then inquired where I was, and how I had disposed
myself. I told him I was on the Maryland side of the bay, at
the plantation of a particular friend who came from England
in the same ship with me; that as for that side of the bay where
he was, I had no habitation. He told me I should go home
with him, and live with him, if I pleased, as long as I lived;
that as to his father, he knew nobody, and would never so
much as guess at me. I considered of that a little, and told
him, that though it was really no concern to me to live at a
distance from him, yet I could not say it would be the most
comfortable thing in the world to me to live in the house with
him, and to have that unhappy object always before me, which
had been such a blow to my peace before; that though I should
be glad to have his company (my son), or to be as near him as
possible while I stayed, yet I could not think of being in the
house where I should be also under constant restraint for fear
of betraying myself in my discourse, nor should I be able to
refrain some expressions in my conversing with him as my
son, that might discover the whole affair, which would by no
means be convenient.

He acknowledged that I was right in all this. 'But then, dear
mother,' says he, 'you shall be as near me as you can.' So he
took me with him on horseback to a plantation next to his own,
and where I was as well entertained as I could have been in his
own. Having left me there he went away home, telling me we
would talk of the main business the next day; and having first
called me his aunt, and given a charge to the people, who it
seems were his tenants, to treat me with all possible respect.
About two hours after he was gone, he sent me a maid-servant
and a Negro boy to wait on me, and provisions ready dressed
for my supper; and thus I was as if I had been in a new world,
and began secretly now to wish that I had not brought my
Lancashire husband from England at all.

However, that wish was not hearty neither, for I lived my
Lancashire husband entirely, as indeed I had ever done from
the beginning; and he merited from me as much as it was
possible for a man to do; but that by the way.

The next morning my son came to visit me again almost as
soon as I was up. After a little discourse, he first of all pulled
out a deerskin bag, and gave it me, with five-and-fifty Spanish
pistoles in it, and told me that was to supply my expenses from
England, for though it was not his business to inquire, yet he
ought to think I did not bring a great deal of money out with
me, it not being usual to bring much money into that country.
Then he pulled out his grandmother's will, and read it over to
me, whereby it appeared that she had left a small plantation,
as he called it, on York River, that is, where my mother lived,
to me, with the stock of servants and cattle upon it, and given
it in trust to this son of mine for my use, whenever he should
hear of my being alive, and to my heirs, if I had any children,
and in default of heirs, to whomsoever I should by will dispose
of it; but gave the income of it, till I should be heard of, or
found, to my said son; and if I should not be living, then it was
to him, and his heirs.

This plantation, though remote from him, he said he did not
let out, but managed it by a head-clerk (steward), as he did
another that was his father's, that lay hard by it, and went over
himself three or four times a year to look after it. I asked him
what he thought the plantation might be worth. He said, if I
would let it out, he would give me about 60 a year for it; but
if I would live on it, then it would be worth much more, and,
he believed, would bring me in about #150 a year. But seeing
I was likely either to settle on the other side of the bay, or
might perhaps have a mind to go back to England again, if I
would let him be my steward he would manage it for me, as
he had done for himself, and that he believed he should be
able to send me as much tobacco to England from it as would
yield me about #100 a year, sometimes more.

This was all strange news to me, and things I had not been
used to; and really my heart began to look up more seriously
than I think it ever did before, and to look with great thankfulness
to the hand of Providence, which had done such wonders for
me, who had been myself the greatest wonder of wickedness
perhaps that had been suffered to live in the world. And I must
again observe, that not on this occasion only, but even on all
other occasions of thankfulness, my past wicked and abominable
life never looked so monstrous to me, and I never so completely
abhorred it, and reproached myself with it, as when I had a
sense upon me of Providence doing good to me, while I had
been making those vile returns on my part.

But I leave the reader to improve these thoughts, as no doubt
they will see cause, and I go on to the fact. My son's tender
carriage and kind offers fetched tears from me, almost all the
while he talked with me. Indeed, I could scarce discourse
with him but in the intervals of my passion; however, at length
I began, and expressing myself with wonder at my being so
happy to have the trust of what I had left, put into the hands
of my own child, I told him ,that as to the inheritance of it, I
had no child but him in the world, and was now past having
any if I should marry, and therefore would desire him to get
a writing drawn, which I was ready to execute, by which I
would, after me, give it wholly to him and to his heirs. And
in the meantime, smiling, I asked him what made him continue
a bachelor so long. His answer was kind and ready, that
Virginia did not yield any great plenty of wives, and that since
I talked of going back to England, I should send him a wife
from London.

This was the substance of our first day's conversation, the
pleasantest day that ever passed over my head in my life, and
which gave me the truest satisfaction. He came every day
after this, and spent great part of his time with me, and carried
me about to several of his friends' houses, where I was
entertained with great respect. Also I dines several times at
his own house, when he took care always to see his half-dead
father so out of the way that I never saw him, or he me. I
made him one present, and it was all I had of value, and that
was one of the gold watches, of which I mentioned above,
that I had two in my chest, and this I happened to have with
me, and I gave it him at his third visit. I told him I had nothing
of any value to bestow but that, and I desired he would now
and then kiss it for my sake. I did not indeed tell him that I
had stole it from a gentlewoman's side, at a meeting-house in
London. That's by the way.

He stood a little while hesitating, as if doubtful whether to
take it or no; but I pressed it on him, and made him accept it,
and it was not much less worth than his leather pouch full of
Spanish gold; no, though it were to be reckoned as if at London,
whereas it was worth twice as much there, where I gave it him.
At length he took it, kissed it, told me the watch should be a
debt upon him that he would be paying as long as I lived.

A few days after he brought the writings of gift, and the
scrivener with them, and I signed them very freely, and
delivered them to him with a hundred kisses; for sure nothing
ever passed between a mother and a tender, dutiful child with
more affection. The next day he brings me an obligation
under his hand and seal, whereby he engaged himself to
manage and improve the plantation for my account, and with
his utmost skill, and to remit the produce to my order wherever
I should be; and withal, to be obliged himself to make up the
produce #100 a year to me. When he had done so, he told me
that as I came to demand it before the crop was off, I had a
right to produce of the current year, and so he paid me #100
in Spanish pieces of eight, and desired me to give him a receipt
for it as in full for that year, ending at Christmas following;
this being about the latter end of August.

I stayed here about five weeks, and indeed had much ado to
get away then. Nay, he would have come over the bay with
me, but I would by no means allow him to it. However, he
would send me over in a sloop of his own, which was built
like a yacht, and served him as well for pleasure as business.
This I accepted of, and so, after the utmost expressions both
of duty and affection, he let me come away, and I arrived safe
in two days at my friend's the Quaker's.

I brought over with me for the use of our plantation, three
horses, with harness and saddles, some hogs, two cows, and
a thousand other things, the gift of the kindest and tenderest
child that ever woman had. I related to my husband all the
particulars of this voyage, except that I called my son my
cousin; and first I told him that I had lost my watch, which
he seemed to take as a misfortune; but then I told him how
kind my cousin had been, that my mother had left me such a
plantation, and that he had preserved it for me, in hopes some
time or other he should hear from me; then I told him that I
had left it to his management, that he would render me a
faithful account of its produce; and then I pulled him out the
#100 in silver, as the first year's produce; and then pulling
out the deerskin purse with the pistoles, 'And here, my dear,'
says I, 'is the gold watch.' My husband--so is Heaven's
goodness sure to work the same effects in all sensible minds
where mercies touch the heart--lifted up both hands, and with
an ecstacy of joy, 'What is God a-doing,' says he, 'for such an
ungrateful dog as I am!' Then I let him know what I had
brought over in the sloop, besides all this; I mean the horses,
hogs, and cows, and other stores for our plantation; all which
added to his surprise, and filled his heart with thankfulness;
and from this time forward I believe he was as sincere a penitent,
and as thoroughly a reformed man, as ever God's goodness
brought back from a profligate, a highwayman, and a robber.
I could fill a larger history than this with the evidence of this
truth, and but that I doubt that part of the story will not be
equally diverting as the wicked part, I have had thoughts of
making a volume of it by itself.

As for myself, as this is to be my own story, not my husband's,
I return to that part which related to myself. We went on with
our plantation, and managed it with the help and diversion of
such friends as we got there by our obliging behaviour, and
especially the honest Quaker, who proved a faithful, generous,
and steady friend to us; and we had very good success, for
having a flourishing stock to begin with, as I have said, and
this being now increased by the addition of #150 sterling in
money, we enlarged our number of servants, built us a very
good house, and cured every year a great deal of land. The
second year I wrote to my old governess, giving her part with
us of the joy of our success, and order her how to lay out the
money I had left with her, which was #250 as above, and to
send it to us in goods, which she performed with her usual
kindness and fidelity, and this arrived safe to us.

Here we had a supply of all sorts of clothes, as well for my
husband as for myself; and I took especial care to buy for
him all those things that I knew he delighted to have; as two
good long wigs, two silver-hilted swords, three or four fine
fowling-pieces, a find saddle with holsters and pistols very
handsome, with a scarlet cloak; and, in a word, everything I
could think of to oblige him, and to make him appear, as he
really was, a very fine gentleman. I ordered a good quantity
of such household stuff as we yet wanted, with linen of all
sorts for us both. As for myself, I wanted very little of clothes
or linen, being very well furnished before. The rest of my
cargo consisted in iron-work of all sorts, harness for horses,
tools, clothes for servants, and woollen cloth, stuffs, serges,
stockings, shoes, hats, and the like, such as servants wear;
and whole pieces also to make up for servants, all by direction
of the Quaker; and all this cargo arrived safe, and in good
condition, with three woman-servants, lusty wenches, which
my old governess had picked for me, suitable enough to the
place, and to the work we had for them to do; one of which
happened to come double, having been got with child by one
of the seamen in the ship, as she owned afterwards, before
the ship got so far as Gravesend; so she brought us a stout
boy, about seven months after her landing.

My husband, you may suppose, was a little surprised at the
arriving of all this cargo from England; and talking with me
after he saw the account of this particular, 'My dear,' says he,
'what is the meaning of all this? I fear you will run us too
deep in debt: when shall we be able to make return for it all?'
I smiled, and told him that is was all paid for; and then I told
him, that what our circumstances might expose us to, I had
not taken my whole stock with me, that I had reserved so
much in my friend's hands, which now we were come over
safe, and was settled in a way to live, I had sent for, as he
might see.

He was amazed, and stood a while telling upon his fingers,
but said nothing. At last he began thus: 'Hold, let's see,' says
he, telling upon his fingers still, and first on his thumb; 'there's
#246 in money at first, then two gold watches, diamond rings,
and plate,' says he, upon the forefinger. Then upon the next
finger, 'Here's a plantation on York River, #100 a year, then
#150 in money, then a sloop load of horses, cows, hogs, and
stores'; and so on to the thumb again. 'And now,' says he, 'a
cargo cost #250 in England, and worth here twice the money.'
'Well,' says I, 'what do you make of all that?' 'Make of it?'
says he; 'why, who says I was deceived when I married a wife
in Lancashire? I think I have married a fortune, and a very
good fortune too,' says he.

In a word, we were now in very considerable circumstances,
and every year increasing; for our new plantation grew upon
our hands insensibly, and in eight years which we lived upon
it, we brought it to such pitch, that the produce was at least
#300 sterling a year; I mean, worth so much in England.

After I had been a year at home again, I went over the bay to
see my son, and to receive another year's income of my
plantation; and I was surprised to hear, just at my landing there,
that my old husband was dead, and had not been buried above
a fortnight. This, I confess, was not disagreeable news,
because now I could appear as I was, in a married condition;
so I told my son before I came from him, that I believed I
should marry a gentleman who had a plantation near mine;
and though I was legally free to marry, as to any obligation
that was on me before, yet that I was shy of it, lest the blot
should some time or other be revived, and it might make a
husband uneasy. My son, the same kind, dutiful, and obliging
creature as ever, treated me now at his own house, paid me
my hundred pounds, and sent me home again loaded with presents.

Some time after this, I let my son know I was married, and
invited him over to see us, and my husband wrote a very
obliging letter to him also, inviting him to come and see him;
and he came accordingly some months after, and happened to
be there just when my cargo from England came in, which I
let him believe belonged all to my husband's estate, not to me.

It must be observed that when the old wretch my brother
(husband) was dead, I then freely gave my husband an account
of all that affair, and of this cousin, as I had called him before,
being my own son by that mistaken unhappy match. He was
perfectly easy in the account, and told me he should have
been as easy if the old man, as we called him, had been alive.
'For,' said he, 'it was no fault of yours, nor of his; it was a
mistake impossible to be prevented.' He only reproached him
with desiring me to conceal it, and to live with him as a wife,
after I knew that he was my brother; that, he said, was a vile
part. Thus all these difficulties were made easy, and we lived
together with the greatest kindness and comfort imaginable.

We are grown old; I am come back to England, being almost
seventy years of age, husband sixty-eight, having performed
much more than the limited terms of my transportation; and
now, notwithstanding all the fatigues and all the miseries we
have both gone through, we have both gone through, we are
both of us in good heart and health. My husband remained
there some time after me to settle our affairs, and at first I had
intended to go back to him, but at his desire I altered that
resolution, and he is come over to England also, where we
resolve to spend the remainder of our years in sincere penitence
for the wicked lives we have lived.

WRITTEN IN THE YEAR 1683

1
The bell at St. Sepulchre's, which tolls upon execution day.

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