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Edgar A. Guest - "A Heap O' Livin', by Edgar A. Guest"

Edna St. Vincent Millay - "Second April"

Jack London - "The Son of the Wolf"

Gene Stratton Porter - "The Song of the Cardinal"

Baby Mine

M >> Margaret Mayo >> Baby Mine




"YOU have it," he grunted without attempting to conceal his
disgust. "SHE'S the one who generally has it." And he nodded
toward Aggie.

Inflamed by her young friend's enthusiasm, Aggie rushed to her
eagerly.

"What is it, Zoie?" she asked.

"The washerwoman!" exclaimed Zoie, as though the revelation had
come straight from heaven. "SHE HAD TWINS," and with that, two
pairs of eyes turned expectantly toward the only man in the room.

Tracing the pattern of the rug with his toe, Jimmy remained
stubbornly oblivious of their attentions. He rearranged the
pillows on the couch, and finally, for want of a better
occupation, he wound his watch. All to no avail. He could feel
Zoie's cat-like gaze upon him.

"Jimmy can get the other one," she said.

"The hell I can," exclaimed Jimmy, starting to his feet and no
longer considering time or place.

The two women gazed at him reproachfully.

"Jimmy!" cried Aggie, in a shocked, hurt voice. "That's the
first time I've ever heard you swear."

"Well, it won't be the LAST time," declared Jimmy hotly, "if THIS
keeps up." His eyes were blazing. He paced to and fro like an
infuriated lion.

"Dearest," said Aggie, "you look almost imposing."

"Nonsense," interrupted Zoie. who found Jimmy unusually
ridiculous. "If I'd known that Jimmy was going to put such an
idea into Alfred's head, I'd have got the two in the first
place."

"Will she let us HAVE the other?" asked Aggie with some
misgiving.

"Of course she will," answered Zoie, leaving Jimmy entirely out
of the conversation. "She's as poor as a church mouse. I'll pay
her well. She'll never miss it. What could she do with one
twin, anyway?"

A snort of rage from Jimmy did not disturb Zoie's enthusiasm.
She proceeded to elaborate her plan.

"I'll adopt them," she declared, "I'll leave them all Alfred's
money. Think of Alfred having real live twins for keeps."

"It would be nice, wouldn't it?" commented Jimmy sarcastically.

Zoie turned to Jimmy, as though they were on the best of terms.

"How much money have you?" she asked.

Before Jimmy could declare himself penniless, Aggie answered for
him with the greatest enthusiasm, "He has a whole lot; he drew
some today."

"Good!" exclaimed Zoie to the abashed Jimmy, and then she
continued in a matter-of- fact tone, "Now, Jimmy," she said, "you
go give the washwoman what money you have on account, then tell
her to come around here in the morning when Alfred has gone out
and I'll settle all the details with her. Go on now, Jimmy," she
continued, "you don't need another letter."

"No," chimed in Aggie sweetly; "you know her now, dear."

"Oh, yes," corroborated Jimmy, with a sarcastic smile and without
budging from the spot on which he stood, "we are great pals now."

"What's the matter?" asked Zoie, astonished that Jimmy was not
starting on his mission with alacrity. "What are you waiting
for?"

Jimmy merely continued to smile enigmatically.

"You know what happened the last time you hesitated," warned
Aggie.

"I know what happened when I DIDN'T hesitate," ruminated Jimmy,
still holding his ground.

Zoie's eyes were wide with surprise. "You don't} mean to say,"
she exclaimed incredulously, "that you aren't GOING--after we
have thought all this out just to SAVE you?"

"Say," answered Jimmy, with a confidential air, "do me a favour,
will you? Stop thinking out things to 'save me.' "

"But, Jimmy----" protested both women simultaneously; but before
they could get further Alfred's distressed voice reached them
from the next room.

"Aggie!" he called frantically.



CHAPTER XVIII

What seemed to be a streak of pink through the room was in
reality Zoie bolting for the bed.

While Zoie hastened to snuggle comfortably under the covers,
Aggie tried without avail to get Jimmy started on his errand.

Getting no response from Aggie, Alfred, bearing one infant in his
arms, came in search of her. Apparently he was having difficulty
with the unfastening of baby's collar.

"Aggie," he called sharply, "how on earth do you get this fool
pin out?"

"Take him back, Alfred," answered Aggie impatiently; "I'll be
there in a minute."

But Alfred had apparently made up his mind that he was not a
success as a nurse.

"You'd better take him now, Aggie," he decided, as he offered the
small person to the reluctant Aggie. "I'll stay here and talk to
Jimmy."

"Oh, but Jimmy was just going out," answered Aggie; then she
turned to her obdurate spouse with mock sweetness, "Weren't you,
dear?" she asked.

"Yes," affirmed Zoie, with a threatening glance toward Jimmy.
"He was going, just now."

Still Jimmy remained rooted to the spot.

"Out?" questioned Alfred. "What for?"

"Just for a little air," explained Aggie blandly.

"Yes," growled Jimmy, "another little heir."

"Air?" repeated Alfred in surprise. "He had air a while ago with
my son. He is going to stay here and tell me the news. Sit
down, Jimmy," he commanded, and to the intense annoyance of Aggie
and Zoie, Jimmy sank resignedly on the couch.

Alfred was about to seat himself beside his friend, when the
'phone rang violently. Being nearest to the instrument, Alfred
reached it first and Zoie and Aggie awaited the consequences in
dread. What they heard did not reassure them nor Jimmy.

"Still down there?" exclaimed Alfred into the 'phone.

Jimmy began to wriggle with a vague uneasiness.

"Well," continued Alfred at the 'phone, "that woman has the wrong
number." Then with a peremptory "Wait a minute," he turned to
Zoie, "The hall boy says that woman who called a while ago is
still down stairs and she won't go away until she has seen you,
Zoie. She has some kind of an idiotic idea that you know where
her baby is."

"How absurd," sneered Zoie.

"How silly," added Aggie.

"How foolish," grunted Jimmy.

"Well," decided Alfred, "I'd better go down stairs and see what's
the matter with her," and he turned toward the door to carry out
his intention.

"Alfred!" called Zoie sharply. She was half out of bed in her
anxiety. "You'll do no such thing. 'Phone down to the boy to
send her away. She's crazy."

"Oh," said Alfred, "then she's been here before? Who is she?"

"Who is she?" answered Zoie, trying to gain time for a new
inspiration. "Why, she's-- she's----" her face lit up with
satisfaction--the idea had arrived. "She's the nurse," she
concluded emphatically.

"The nurse?" repeated Alfred, a bit confused.

"Yes," answered Zoie, pretending to be annoyed with his dull
memory. "She's the one I told you about, the one I had to
discharge."

"Oh," said Alfred, with the relief of sudden comprehension; "the
crazy one?"

Aggie and Zoie nodded their heads and smiled at him tolerantly,
then Zoie continued to elaborate. "You see," she said, "the poor
creature was so insane about little Jimmy that I couldn't go near
the child."

"What!" exclaimed Alfred in a mighty rage. "I'll soon tell the
boy what to do with her," he declared, and he rushed to the
'phone. Barely had Alfred taken the receiver from the hook when
the outer door was heard to bang. Before he could speak a
distracted young woman, whose excitable manner bespoke her
foreign origin, swept through the door without seeing him and
hurled herself at the unsuspecting Zoie. The woman's black hair
was dishevelled, and her large shawl had fallen from her
shoulders. To Jimmy, who was crouching behind an armchair, she
seemed a giantess.

"My baby!" cried the frenzied mother, with what was unmistakably
an Italian accent. "Where is he?" There was no answer; her eyes
sought the cradle. "Ah!" she shrieked, then upon finding the
cradle empty, she redoubled her lamentations and again she bore
down upon the terrified Zoie.

"You," she cried, "you know where my baby is!"

For answer, Zoie sank back amongst her pillows and drew the bed
covers completely over her head. Alfred approached the bed to
protect his young wife; the Italian woman wheeled about and
perceived a small child in his arms. She threw herself upon him.

"I knew it," she cried; "I knew it!"

Managing to disengage himself from what he considered a mad
woman, and elevating one elbow between her and the child, Alfred
prevented the mother from snatching the small creature from his
arms.

"Calm yourself, madam," he commanded with a superior air. "We
are very sorry for you, of course, but we can't have you coming
here and going on like this. He's OUR baby and----"

"He's NOT your baby!" cried the infuriated mother; "he's MY baby.
Give him to me. Give him to me," and with that she sprang upon
the uncomfortable Alfred like a tigress. Throwing her whole
weight on his uplifted elbow, she managed to pull down his arm
until she could look into the face of the washerwoman's promising
young offspring. The air was rent by a scream that made each
individual hair of Jimmy's head stand up in its own defence. He
could feel a sickly sensation at the top of his short thick neck.

"He's NOT my baby," wailed the now demented mother, little
dreaming that the infant for which she was searching was now
reposing comfortably on a soft pillow in the adjoining room.

As for Alfred, all of this was merely confirmation of Zoie's
statement that this poor soul was crazy, and he was tempted to
dismiss her with worthy forbearance.

"I am glad, madam," he said, "that you are coming to your
senses."

Now, all would have gone well and the bewildered mother would no
doubt have left the room convinced of her mistake, had not
Jimmy's nerves got the better of his judgment. Having slipped
cautiously from his position behind the armchair he was tiptoeing
toward the door, and was flattering himself on his escape, when
suddenly, as his forward foot cautiously touched the threshold,
he heard the cry of the captor in his wake, and before he could
possibly command the action of his other foot, he felt himself
being forcibly drawn backward by what appeared to be his too
tenacious coat-tails.

"If only they would tear," thought Jimmy, but thanks to the
excellence of the tailor that Aggie had selected for him, they
did NOT "tear."

Not until she had anchored Jimmy safely to the centre of the rug
did the irate mother pour out the full venom of her resentment
toward him. From the mixture of English and Italian that
followed, it was apparent that she was accusing Jimmy of having
stolen her baby.

"Take me to him," she demanded tragically; "my baby--take me to
him!"

Jimmy appealed to Aggie and Zoie. Their faces were as blank as
his own. He glanced at Alfred.

"Humour her," whispered Alfred, much elated by the evidence of
his own self-control as compared to Jimmy's utter demoralisation
under the apparently same circumstances.

Still Jimmy did not budge.

Alfred was becoming vexed; he pointed first to his own forehead,
then to that of Jimmy's hysterical captor. He even illustrated
his meaning by making a rotary motion with his forefinger,
intended to remind Jimmy that the woman was a lunatic.

Still Jimmy only stared at him and all the while the woman was
becoming more and more emphatic in her declaration that Jimmy
knew where her baby was.

"Sure, Jimmy," said Alfred, out of all patience with Jimmy's
stupidity and tiring of the strain of the woman's presence. "You
know where her baby is."

"Ah!" cried the mother, and she towered over Jimmy with a wild
light in her eyes. "Take me to him," she demanded; "take me to
him."

Jimmy rolled his large eyes first toward Aggie, then toward Zoie
and at last toward Alfred. There was no mercy to be found
anywhere.

"Take her to him, Jimmy," commanded a concert of voices; and
pursued by a bundle of waving colours and a medley of discordant
sounds, Jimmy shot from the room.



CHAPTER XXIV

The departure of Jimmy and the crazed mother was the occasion for
a general relaxing among the remaining occupants of the room.
Exhausted by what had passed Zoie had ceased to interest herself
in the future. It was enough for the present that she could sink
back upon her pillows and draw a long breath without an evil face
bending over her, and without the air being rent by screams.

As for Aggie, she fell back upon the window seat and closed her
eyes. The horrors into which Jimmy might be rushing had not yet
presented themselves to her imagination.

Of the three, Alfred was the only one who had apparently received
exhilaration from the encounter. He was strutting about the room
with the babe in his arms, undoubtedly enjoying the sensations of
a hero. When he could sufficiently control his feeling of
elation, he looked down at the small person with an air of
condescension and again lent himself to the garbled sort of
language with which defenceless infants are inevitably
persecuted.

"Tink of dat horrid old woman wanting to steal our own little
oppsie, woppsie, toppsie babykins," he said. Then he turned to
Zoie with an air of great decision. "That woman ought to be
locked up," he declared, "she's dangerous," and with that he
crossed to Aggie and hurriedly placed the infant in her
unsuspecting arms. "Here, Aggie," he said, "you take Alfred and
get him into bed."

Glad of an excuse to escape to the next room and recover her self
control, Aggie quickly disappeared with the child.

For some moments Alfred continued to pace up and down the room;
then he came to a full stop before Zoie.

"I'll have to have something done to that woman," he declared
emphatically.

"Jimmy will do enough to her," sighed Zoie, weakly.

"She's no business to be at large," continued Alfred; then, with
a business-like air, he started toward the telephone.

"Where are you going?" asked Zoie.

Alfred did not answer. He was now calling into the 'phone, "Give
me information."

"What on earth are you doing?" demanded Zoie, more and more
disturbed by his mysterious manner.

"One can't be too careful," retorted Alfred in his most paternal
fashion; "there's an awful lot of kidnapping going on these
days."

"Well, you don't suspect information, do you?" asked Zoie.

Again Alfred ignored her; he was intent upon things of more
importance.

"Hello," he called into the 'phone, "is this information?"
Apparently it was for he continued, with a satisfied air, "Well,
give me the Fullerton Street Police Station."

"The Police?" cried Zoie, sitting up in bed and looking about the
room with a new sense of alarm.

Alfred did not answer.

"Aggie!" shrieked the over-wrought young wife.

Alfred attempted to reassure her. "Now, now, dear, don't get
nervous," he said, "I am only taking the necessary precautions."
And again he turned to the 'phone.

Alarmed by Zoie's summons, Aggie entered the room hastily. She
was not reassured upon hearing Alfred's further conversation at
the 'phone.

"Is this the Fullerton Street Police Station?" asked Alfred.

"The Police!" echoed Aggie, and her eyes sought Zoie's
inquiringly.

"Sh! Sh!" called Alfred over his shoulder to the excited Aggie,
then he continued into the 'phone. "Is Donneghey there?" There
was a pause. Alfred laughed jovialiy. "It is? Well, hello,
Donneghey, this is your old friend Hardy, Alfred Hardy at the
Sherwood. I've just got back," then he broke the happy news to
the no doubt appreciative Donneghey. "What do you think?" he
said, "I'm a happy father."

Zoie puckered her small face in disgust.

Alfred continued to elucidate joyfully at the 'phone.

"Doubles," he said, "yes--sure--on the level."

"I don't know why you have to tell the whole neighbourhood,"
snapped Zoie. Her colour was visibly rising.

But Alfred was now in the full glow of his genial account to his
friend. "Set 'em up?" he repeated in answer to an evident
suggestion from the other end of the line, "I should say I would.
The drinks are on me. Tell the boys I'll be right over. And
say, Donneghey," he added, in a more confidential tone, "I want
to bring one of the men home with me. I want him to keep an eye
on the house to-night"; then after a pause, he concluded
confidentially, "I'll tell you all about it when I get there. It
looks like a kidnapping scheme to me," and with that he hung up
the receiver, unmistakably pleased with himself, and turned his
beaming face toward Zoie.

"It's all right, dear," he said, rubbing his hands together with
evident satisfaction, "Donneghey is going to let us have a
Special Officer to watch the house to-night."

"I won't HAVE a special officer," declared Zoie vehemently; then
becoming aware of Alfred's great surprise, she explained
half-tearfully, "I'm not going to have the police hanging around
our very door. I would feel as though I were in prison."

"You ARE in prison, my dear," returned the now irrepressible
Alfred. "A prison of love-- you and our precious boys." He
stooped and implanted a gracious kiss on her forehead, then
turned toward the table for his hat. "Now," he said, "I'll just
run around the corner, set up the drinks for the boys, and bring
the officer home with me," and drawing himself up proudly, he
cried gaily in parting, "I'll bet there's not another man in
Chicago who has what I have to- night."

"I hope not," groaned Zoie. as the door closed behind him.
Then, thrusting her two small feet from beneath the coverlet and
perching on the side of the bed, she declared to Aggie that
"Alfred was getting more idiotic every minute."

"He's worse than idiotic," corrected Aggie. "He's getting
dangerous. If he gets the police around here before we give that
baby back, they'll get the mother. She'll tell all she knows and
that will be the end of Jimmy!"

"End of Jimmy?" exclaimed Zoie, "it'll be the end of ALL of us."

"I can see our pictures in the papers, right now," groaned Aggie.
"Jimmy will be the villain."

"Jimmy IS a villain," declared Zoie. "Where is he? Why doesn't
he come back? How am I ever going to get that other twin?"

"There is only one thing to do," decided Aggie, "I must go for it
myself." And she snatched up her cape from the couch and started
toward the door.

"You?" cried Zoie, in alarm, "and leave me alone?"

"It's our only chance," argued Aggie. "I'll have to do it now,
before Alfred gets back."

"But Aggie," protested Zoie, clinging to her departing friend,
"suppose that crazy mother should come back?"

"Nonsense," replied Aggie, and before Zoie could actually realise
what was happening the bang of the outside door told her that she
was alone.



CHAPTER XXV

Wondering what new terrors awaited her, Zoie glanced uncertainly
from door to door. So strong had become her habit of taking
refuge in the bed, that unconsciously she backed toward it now.
Barely had she reached the centre of the room when a terrific
crash of breaking glass from the adjoining room sent her
shrieking in terror over the footboard, and head first under the
covers. Here she would doubtless have remained until suffocated,
had not Jimmy in his backward flight from one of the inner rooms
overturned a large rocker. This additional shock to Zoie's
overstrung nerves forced a wild scream from her lips, and an
answering exclamation from the nerve-racked Jimmy made her sit
bolt upright. She gazed at him in astonishment. His tie was
awry, one end of his collar had taken leave of its anchorage
beneath his stout chin, and was now just tickling the edge of his
red, perspiring brow. His hair was on end and his feelings were
undeniably ruffled. As usual Zoie's greeting did not tend to
conciliate him.

"How did YOU get here?" she asked with an air of reproach.

"The fire-escape," panted Jimmy and he nodded mysteriously toward
the inner rooms of the apartment.

"Fire-escape?" echoed Zoie. There was only one and that led
through the bathroom window.

Jimmy explained no further. He was now peeping cautiously out of
the window toward the pavement below.

"Where's the mother?" demanded Zoie.

Jimmy jerked his thumb in the direction of the street. Zoie
gazed at him with grave apprehension.

"Jimmy!" she exclaimed. "You haven't killed her?"

Jimmy shook his head and continued to peer cautiously out of the
window.

"What did you do with her?" called the now exasperated Zoie.

"What did _I_ do with her?" repeated Jimmy, a flash of his old
resentment returning. "What did SHE do with ME?"

For the first time, Zoie became fully conscious of Jimmy's
ludicrous appearance. Her overstrained nerves gave way and she
began to laugh hysterically.

"Say," shouted Jimmy, towering over the bed and devoutly wishing
that she were his wife so that he might strike her with impunity.
"Don't you sic any more lunatics onto me."

It is doubtful whether Zoie's continued laughter might not have
provoked Jimmy to desperate measures, had not the 'phone at that
moment directed their thoughts toward worse possibilities. After
the instrument had continued to ring persistently for what seemed
to Zoie an age, she motioned to Jimmy to answer it. He responded
by retreating to the other side of the room.

"It may be Aggie," suggested Zoie.

For the first time, Jimmy became aware that Aggie was nowhere in
the apartment.

"Good Lord!" he exclaimed, as he realised that he was again
tete-a-tete with the terror of his dreams. "Where IS Aggie?"

"Gone to do what YOU should have done," was Zoie's characteristic
answer.

"Well," answered Jimmy hotly, "it's about time that somebody
besides me did something around this place."

"YOU," mocked Zoie, "all YOU'VE ever done was to hoodoo me from
the very beginning."

"If you'd taken my advice," answered Jimmy, "and told your
husband the truth about the luncheon, there'd never have been any
'beginning.' "

"If, if, if," cried Zoie, in an agony of impatience, "if you'd
tipped that horrid old waiter enough, he'd never have told
anyway."

"I'm not buying waiters to cover up your crimes," announced Jimmy
with his most self- righteous air.

"You'll be buying more than that to cover up your OWN crimes
before you've finished," retorted Zoie.

"Before I've finished with YOU, yes," agreed Jimmy. He wheeled
upon her with increasing resentment. "Do you know where I expect
to end up?" he asked.

"I know where you OUGHT to end up," snapped Zoie.

"I'll finish in the electric chair," said Jimmy. "I can feel
blue lightning chasing up and down my spine right now."

"Well, I wish you HAD finished in the electric chair," declared
Zoie, "before you ever dragged me into that awful old
restaurant."

"Oh, you do, do you?" answered Jimmy shaking his fist at her
across the foot of the bed. For the want of adequate words to
express his further feelings, Jimmy was beginning to jibber, when
the outer door was heard to close, and he turned to behold Aggie
entering hurriedly with something partly concealed by her long
cape.

"It's all right," explained Aggie triumphantly to Zoie. "I've
got it." She threw her cape aside and disclosed the fruits of
her conquest.

"So," snorted Jimmy in disgust, slightly miffed by the apparent
ease with which Aggie had accomplished a task about which he had
made so much ado, "you've gone into the business too, have you?"

Aggie deigned no reply to him. She continued in a businesslike
tone to Zoie.

"Where's Alfred?" she asked.

"Still out," answered Zoie.

"Thank Heaven," sighed Aggie, then she turned to Jimmy and
addressed him in rapid, decided tones. "Now, dear," she said,
"I'll just put the new baby to bed, then I'll give you the other
one and you can take it right down to the mother."

Jimmy made a vain start in the direction of the fire-escape.
Four detaining hands were laid upon him.

"Don't try anything like that," warned Aggie; "you can't get out
of this house without that baby. The mother is down stairs now.
She's guarding the door. I saw her." And Aggie sailed
triumphantly out of the room to make the proposed exchange of
babies.

Before Jimmy was able to suggest to himself an escape from
Aggie's last plan of action, the telephone again began to cry for
attention.

Neither Jimmy nor Zoie could summon courage to approach the
impatient instrument, and as usual Zoie cried frantically for
Aggie.

Aggie was not long in returning to the room and this time she
bore in her arms the infant so strenuously demanded by its mad
mother.

"Here you are, Jimmy," she said; "here's the other one. Now
take him down stairs quickly before Alfred gets back." She
attempted to place the unresisting babe in Jimmy's chubby arms,
but Jimmy's freedom was not to be so easily disposed of.

"What!" he exclaimed, backing away from the small creature in
fear and abhorrence, "take that bundle of rags down to the hotel
office and have that woman hystericing all over me. No, thanks."

"Oh well," answered Aggie, distracted by the persistent ringing
of the 'phone, "then hold him a minute until I answer the
'phone."

This at least was a compromise, and reluctantly Jimmy allowed the
now wailing infant to be placed in his arms.

"Jig it, Jimmy, jig it," cried Zoie. Jimmy looked down
helplessly at the baby's angry red face, but before he had made
much headway with the "jigging," Aggie returned to them, much
excited by the message which she had just received over the
telephone.

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