Stories From the Old Attic
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7 STORIES FROM THE OLD ATTIC
Robert Harris
1992
Copyright 1992 Robert Harris
Permission is granted to share this book as an electronic text
All other rights, include hardcopy publication, are reserved
To Mom
Contents:
The Second Greatest Commandment
A Good Horse and a Better
It's Nut Valuable
Stewardship
The Man Who Believed in Miracles
A Fish Story
Man
Love
Indecision
The Limit
How Sir Reginald Helped the King
How the Noble Percival Won the Fair Arissa
Truth Carved in Stone
How Sir Philo Married a Beautiful Princess Instead of the Woman He Loved
Serendipity
A Tale Revealing the Wisdom of Being a Cork on the River of Life
The Art of Truth
Matthew 18:3
The Boy and the Vulture
Three Flat Tires
The History of Professor De Laix
How the Humans Finally Learned to Like Themselves
The Caterpillar and the Bee
The Wise One
On the Heroic Suffering of Mankind
The Quest
Life
Discernment
It Depends on How You Look at It: Eight Vignettes on Perspective
The Strange Adventure
In Defeat There Is Victory
The Oppressed Girl
Two Conversations on Direction
Semiotics Strikes Out
Seeing is Believing
A Traditional Story
The Day Creativity Met the Linear Dragon
The Wall and the Bridge
The Wish
Several One Way Conversations
How the King Learned about Love
The Fly and the Elephant
The Man Who Talked Backwards
The Clue
An Analogy
The Second Greatest Commandment
A man was out shoveling the excess gravel off his driveway and
into the graveled road that ran by his house. A neighbor happened
to be walking by just as the man tossed a shovel full down the road
the opposite way the man used to drive in and out. "I see you
aren't messing up the part of the road you use," sneered the neighbor.
A few minutes later another neighbor happened by and saw the
man toss a shovel full of gravel down the other part of the road. "I
see you are fixing only the part of the road you use, and not the
part others must use," sneered the second neighbor.
The shoveler stood still with a shovel full of gravel as the
second man left. Now unsure of what to do with it that would be
agreeable to his neighbors, he decided simply to dump it out onto
his driveway on the very spot whence he had scooped it up. Just as
he did so, a third neighbor happened to be walking by. "I see you
are stealing gravel from the road for your driveway," sneered the
third man. "People like you are what's wrong with this country."
At this point the homeowner put his shovel away and sat down
with his pipe to contemplate these occurrences. Pretty soon a
neighbor from further down the street drove by and saw the man
sitting down enjoying his pipe. "If you weren't so lazy, you'd
shovel some of that gravel off your driveway and back onto the road
where it belongs," the driver sneered as he drove away, spinning his
tires and scattering gravel in every direction.
A Good Horse and a Better
A man once came upon a lad about midday skipping stones across
a pond. "Hello, young man," he said, approaching. "What brings you
here on a school day?"
"I wrote a poem yesterday which was the best in class, and the
teacher said I could play today while the other children wrote
more poems."
"Well, then, you are to be congratulated. Yours is certainly a
deed of distinction. And as a reward," he added, settling himself
on a tree stump, "let me tell you a story about two horses."
"Oh, yes, do," the youth said eagerly, sitting down at the
man's feet.
"The first horse lived in Arabia, and he was beautiful and
strong. He had never lost a race. And he was shrewd. He would
run just hard enough to pull away from the other horses in the race,
and then he would let up and trot, or even walk, across the finish
line, to the great embarrassment and humiliation of all the
other horses."
"He was clearly a superior animal," the young poet interjected.
"Yes, he was," agreed the man. "Now the other horse lived in
Macedonia, and he, too, was strong and noble. He had, however, lost
one race, the first race of his life; and some say he always
remembered that when he ran."
"How grating to the heart it must be to lose so early and have
a blight on one's reputation," mused the young man.
"But this horse always won every other race. And unlike our
first horse, when this Macedonian horse ran and knew he had beaten
the other horses, instead of letting up he redoubled his efforts and
ran even harder--as hard as he could--for he now ran not against the
fortuitous competitors with whom he began the race, but against his
own heart: against all horses past and all horses future, against
every horse in Macedonia and every one in Arabia, and also against
the ideal horse with a pace so frighteningly fast that few can
conceive its possibility. And even more than this, he ran toward
the perfection of excellence itself. And when he crossed the
finish line, as happy as he was to win, he secretly lamented that
his opponents had not been fast enough to threaten him and push
him onward."
"Even though he lost once," the lad remarked after a short
silence, "perhaps this horse was as good as the Arabian."
"Perhaps so, my child," said the man, with a smile. "Perhaps so."
It's Nut Valuable
Once upon a time a wise and thoughtful craftsman made a new
electric adding machine. It was very complex with many gears and
levers and wheels, and it did amazing things, always adding up the
numbers correctly. So the craftsman sold it to a businessman for
many thousands of dollars. All the parts inside the new adding
machine felt good about being so valuable. They worked hard and
happily all day, and often talked about how useful they were to
the businessman.
But one day a spring noticed a little nut just sitting on
the end of a shaft. The spring pulled at the lever he was
attached to and pointed. Soon the whole works knew. "You lazy
little nut," said a spinning gear, "why don't you get to work?"
"But I am working," said the nut. "Holding on is my job."
"That's stupid," yelled a cam. "I don't believe our maker put
you here. You just sneaked in to steal some of our glory. Why don't
you get out?"
"Well," said the nut, "I'm sure our maker knew what he was
doing, and that I do serve a purpose. I hold on as tightly as I
can." But all the machinery began to squeal and abuse the nut so
violently that he felt very sad and began to doubt himself.
"Maybe I am useless," he thought. He appealed to the shaft he was
threaded onto.
"Look, kid," the shaft told him, "I've got plenty of other
parts holding on to me. I shouldn't have to support you, too."
So finally the little nut decided to unscrew himself and go
away. He dropped off the shaft and fell through a hole in the
bottom of the machine. "Good riddance," said the motor.
"Yeah, good riddance," all the other parts agreed.
Rather quickly the nut was forgotten and things went on as they
had for awhile. But in a few hours, the shaft began to feel funny.
At first he began to vibrate. Then he started sliding and slipping.
He called for help to the other parts attached to him, but they
could do nothing. Presently the shaft fell completely out of his
mounting hole, causing many levers and gears and cams to slip out
of alignment and crash against each other, and forcing the whole
machine to grind to a halt with an awful noise. The motor tried
his best to keep things going--he tried so hard that he bent many
of the parts--and then as he tried even harder, he burned himself
out. "This is all the fault of that little nut," the ruined parts
all agreed.
"I'll give ya three bucks for it," said the junk man to the
office manager.
Stewardship
A wise man approached three young men standing around idly.
"Here is a coin worth a hundred dollars," the wise man said to the
first youth. "What should I do with it?"
"Give it to me," he said at once.
"Rather than reward such selfishness and greed," responded the
wise man, "it would be better to throw the money into the sea." And
with this, the wise man threw the coin into the water. "Now," he
said to the second youth, "here is another coin. What should I do
with it?"
The second youth, feeling shrewd, answered, "Throw it into the sea."
But the wise man said, "That would be a careless waste. To
follow a bad example only because it is an example is folly. Better
than throwing this money away would be to give it to the poor." And
he gave the money to a beggar sitting nearby. "I have one last
coin," the wise man went on, talking to the third youth. "What
shall I do with it?"
The third youth had been paying attention, and, thinking he
would get the money if he avoided the greed and wastefulness implied
in the answers of his friends, said, "Why, give it to the poor."
"That is a very wise and kind answer," said the wise man,
smiling. And because you have answered so well" (at this the youth
brightened with expectation), "I will indeed take your good advice
and give the money to the poor."
"Don't I get anything for my wisdom?" demanded the youth.
"You have already received something much better than money,"
said the wise man.
The Man Who Believed in Miracles
Once upon a time a traveler arrived in a land quite like our
own, full of modern technology like cars and computers and whistling
teapots, but with these two differences: there were no television
sets and no airplanes. In fact, nothing at all had ever been seen
in the sky, not even a bird, and the only movies the people ever saw
were in the theaters.
The traveler stayed for about a month on the eastern shore where
he had arrived, and then decided to visit the western cities. He
mentioned his decision one evening at a meeting of the principal
scientists and educators of the region, who had gathered to hear of
his travels. Someone mentioned that the west had much to offer, but
that the journey between the two areas was unpleasant, consisting of
crossing a hot, empty desert. "In that case," said the traveler,
"I'll just fly."
"Is that like sleep?" one of the scientists asked.
"No, no," the traveler replied. "You know, fly through the air,
like a bird."
"And what is a bird?" someone asked. And so the traveler began
to explain about flight and what an airplane was and how it flew from
one place to another. The room became very quiet, and the
expressions on the faces of everyone present darkened.
"Does he expect us to believe this?" one man whispered to another.
"Well, you know what liars travelers are," someone else added.
Finally the host spoke up, slightly embarrassed and slightly indignant.
"If this is your idea of a joke," he began, but was interrupted
by the surprised traveler.
"Why, it's no joke at all. People fly all the time."
"I am sorry that you so much underestimate the intelligence and
learning of your audience," said a professor across the table. "That
a person could enter some metal device--like a car with fins--and
rise into the air, and be sustained there, and move forward, why that
clearly violates everything we know about the law of gravity and the
laws of physics. If we have learned anything from a thousand years
of study of the natural world, it is that an object heavier than air
must return immediately to earth when it is tossed into the sky."
"Hear, hear," two or three people muttered.
"Now, if you perhaps mean that these 'airplanes,' as you call
them, are somehow flung into the air for a short distance and then
fall to the ground, well, then perhaps that would be possible." The
professor looked expectantly and a bit condescendingly at the
traveler, hoping that the man would take this face-saving opportunity.
"No, no. You don't understand," said the traveler. "The
airplanes have powerful motors and the craft rise into the air, and
they stay up as long as they want, as long as the fuel holds out."
There were several audible "hmmphs" around the room.
"Tell us then," said another scholar, in a saccharine voice,
"how this device works. What makes it fly?"
"Well, I don't know exactly how it works. It has something to
do with air flowing over the wings."
"You don't know--you cannot explain--how it works, this device
that runs counter to everything we know about the natural world, yet
you believe in it anyway."
"Believe in it?" asked the traveler, a bit confused by this
turn of phrase. "Of course I 'believe in it.' I fly on one all the
time at home."
"And how do you control its motions?" a man asked, without
removing his pipe. The audience was clearly beginning to patronize
the traveler, and he was growing a little irritated.
"Oh, I don't control it. There's a pilot for that."
"I see," the pipe smoker said. "So this airplane contains both
you and the pilot. You're telling us that perhaps four or five
hundred pounds of dead weight can travel through the air as long
as it wants."
"As long as the fuel holds out," added one of the hmmphers,
with amusement.
"And all the time sneering at the law of gravity and laughing
science in the face," someone else noted.
"Well, actually, the planes are much larger than that," said
the traveler. "Many of them hold two or three hundred people and
weigh, my, I don't know--many thousands of pounds."
"I think we have heard enough," the now-fully-embarrassed
and half-angered host said. "It was amusing for awhile, but it's
time to put an end to this nonsense."
"It is not nonsense," the traveler protested. "It is the truth."
"Then you really believe this madman's drivel you've been
feeding us?" the host asked, rather hotly.
"Of course. How can I not believe it? I see it and live it
every day. And here," he added, remembering something, "I even
have a photograph."
"Obviously faked," said the host, dismissing it after a glance.
"Who invited this charlatan?" someone asked of no one in particular.
"I thought science had put an end to all this miraculous event
stuff long ago," said another man, rising from his chair and
preparing to leave.
"Well, let's not pursue this pointless discussion," the
host said. "Our guest apparently knows nothing of science, and
is impervious to logic and to the considered opinion of the best
minds of our nation. There's nothing left to do but adjourn."
The meeting began to break up, and the traveler was putting on
his coat when the man with the pipe made one last attempt to
reason with him.
"We are all scientists here, all educated men. All of us
agree that it is impossible for a heavier-than-air device to
fly on its own through the air. Don't you see that? This is
against the laws of nature--it violates the law of gravity."
"Well," said the traveler, "perhaps there is another law,
or perhaps there is a higher law than the law of gravity,
which, when it is understood, will explain how planes can fly."
"That's just what I'd expect a religious fanatic to say,"
said a man who had been listening in. "Science can jump
into the trash as far as you religious types are concerned."
"Not at all," said the traveler. "But your science is not
perfect. You do not yet know everything about everything, what
is possible and what is not possible."
"Go take your religion to a church and keep it away from
serious people," the man concluded, stomping out of the room.
In the weeks that followed, the traveler was ridiculed
and denounced in the newspapers, being called everything from a
con artist to a prospective mental patient. (The scientific
journals said nothing about the man because they considered the
whole matter as beneath serious thought.) As a result, the
traveler was often left to himself, and so he pulled out his
tiny portable television set and began to watch it. Just by
chance, some visitors happened to come by and see the little
box. They were very impressed and urged the traveler to market
his invention for putting a movie inside such a small space.
In a few days, word had spread about this mini-movie and
several scientists were convinced (after some debate) to come see
it, together with some engineers representing the movie projector
manufacturers of the nation.
They were sufficiently impressed as they watched a few scenes,
but when the traveler changed channels, their enthusiasm turned to
gaping astonishment. The traveler switched all around, showing
them twenty channels in all. Such was the amazement and even
incredulity of the engineers that they already began to suspect
some kind of trick. The scientists looked confused.
"You certainly have a lot of films stored in that little
box," one of the engineers said. "How do you get them all in there?"
"The pictures are not in the box," said the traveler. "They
are all over in the air around us. This antenna brings them in
and the set makes them visible." The engineers laughed while the
scientists sneered, the latter now sorry they had allowed themselves
to be talked into coming to hear this notorious nut.
"Come now," one of the scientists said. "Do you expect us
to believe that there are pictures floating around us in the
air--pictures we cannot see? And that twenty sets of these pictures
are all present at once, scrambled together, just waiting for that
little box to take them and sort them out? What do you take us for
anyway--a bunch of gullible greenhorn fools?"
"And besides," continued an engineer, "how do these pictures
get into the air in the first place? Where do they come from?"
"They're sent from a satellite in the sky," the traveler
said, as all heads looked up. "You can't see it, of course.
It's too high. But it's there."
"And of course you expect us to believe in something we can't
see," said one of the scientists, with a touch of scorn.
"Believe it because of its effects--the results--the
evidence of its existence," the traveler said. "If it weren't
there, you would see no pictures."
"We know you're lying," another engineer said. "Even if there
were a device in the sky, held up by a balloon or whatever, it
couldn't send a signal down here without a wire. That would be
against everything we know about electricity. And I don't see
any wire."
"Well, it doesn't use a wire," said the traveler. "The
signals are sent through the air. And the satellite isn't
held up by a balloon; it stays up because it's high enough
so that gravity doesn't pull it down."
"Now he's denying the law of gravity again," said one of the
scientists. "Let's go. I've heard enough. Whatever he does to
perform his little trick, he isn't telling us about it, so let's
just leave."
"Yeah, let's get out of here," another scientist said. "Every
time we catch him in an impossibility, he tells us the explanation
is in the sky." Then turning to the traveler to say goodbye, he
added, "We cannot believe something when the weight of scientific
evidence is against it."
"But when the physical evidence is clearly before you," said
the traveler, "how can you not believe, even if your theories cannot
explain it?"
"Because such an event would be a miracle, and science has
nothing to do with miracles."
"Then perhaps science is the poorer for it," said the
traveler, sitting down to watch his television, which just then
happened to be showing a dove flying silently across the sky.
A Fish Story
The bright sun and the gentle wind had made the little fish
almost bold that summer day, enough so that they were swimming all
over the pond, from their home in the reeds at one end to the rocky
beach at the other. Or at least they swam very near to the rocky
beach--as near as they dared--for all the older fish constantly
warned them to stay away. Some of the dangers were clear enough,
such as the wading birds who stepped into the shallow water, hoping
to pluck out a little fish and swallow him right down, and the
foxes, whose gigantic teeth were too awful even to think about. But
there were other evils that were not so distinct. Hideous and
unimaginable these were, with tales of fish swimming into the area
and never to be heard from again, vague reports of sudden
disappearances, and some hysterical tales, impossible to make sense
of, of leaping shadows, wild splashings, worms flying through the
water, and such like.
The dangers of the rocky beach could not quite be isolated in
the minds of the little fish, so that they felt a general sense of
impending doom whenever they swam more than a few feet from home.
That is why, one day when three little fish met each other suddenly
among the reeds, they were all momentarily startled. But soon they
began talking and relaxed a little. "This is a wonderful pond,"
said one. "It's so big. But I've never been this far away from
home before."
"Me either," said another. "I just hope we're safe here
in these reeds."
"I do too," agreed the third. "You never know where an enemy
may come from."
"And you can't be too careful," added the first.
"By the way," said one, "my name is Swimmy Fish. What's yours?"
"Finny Fish," said another.
"I'm Chirpy Bird," said the third.
Swimmy Fish and Finny Fish gave a start, looked at each other
with surprise and terror, and then swam off in opposite directions
as fast as they could. "Wait!" cried Chirpy Bird. "What's wrong?
Come back!" He looked around anxiously, himself frightened by their
fright, though he could see no sign of danger anywhere. But their
fear hung over the area, so he decided to swim toward home, at more
than his usual speed.
He had not gone very far when he saw several adult fish swimming
toward him with serious and half-frightened expressions on their faces.
When they saw him, they stopped at a distance. "Stop there," one of
them demanded, so Chirpy Bird stopped. The big fish seemed to be
engaged in a solemn discussion. Every once in awhile one of them
waved a fin or glanced in his direction. Finally, two of the largest
fish approached a little nearer. "Don't make any sudden moves," the
largest one, whose name was Glubber Fish, said with a mixture of
command and pleading.
"I don't understand," the little fish said, bewildered.
"Are you Chirpy Bird?" asked Glubber Fish.
"Yes. I--"
"You must leave the pond." It was a tone of finality.
"But why?" asked Chirpy Bird.
"Because you'll soon be eating us and our children. Besides,
birds don't live under water."
"But I'm not a bird," Chirpy Bird protested.
"What's your name?" demanded the other, who was called Spotted Fish.
"Chirpy Bird. But--"
"There you are," he said, with a tone of satisfaction.
"My name is Chirpy Bird," said the little one, "but I'm a fish."
"Nonsense," grumped Spotted Fish. "Whoever heard of a fish
named Chirpy Bird?"
"Whether you've heard of me or not, here I am," said Chirpy
Bird, not knowing what else to say.
"Totally illogical," interrupted Whisker Fish, who had just come near.
"As well as disrespectful and impudent," added Glubber fish.
"You must listen to reason," said Whisker Fish, self-importantly
brushing himself in preparation. "And here it is: You are Chirpy
Bird; granted. Birds eat fish; granted. Therefore, you eat fish."
"But--" Chirpy Bird tried to explain.
"There is no 'but.' It's a syllogism, and cannot be answered.
The conclusion follows necessarily," said Whisker Fish. "It's
pure logic."
"And it also follows," said Glubber fish, "that you must leave
the pond."
"I'll die if I leave the pond," said Chirpy Bird.
"That's not our problem," said Glubber Fish.
"And it's an irrelevant objection," added Whisker Fish. The
rest of the adult fish had gradually been easing forward during
this conversation and now, at the direction of Glubber Fish, the
whole group escorted Chirpy Bird down toward the rocky beach. In
a few minutes they reached a low spot near a weeping willow,
where several of the large fish grabbed Chirpy Bird and threw him
onto the shore.
"Now fly away and leave us alone," one of them said. And leave
them alone he did.
Man
Somewhere in a deep, tropical jungle lived a tribe of natives with
extremely odd behavior. Generations ago the tribe had in some
obscure fashion contracted a parasite which induced a seemingly
permanent delirium in each native, and which was passed on to
subsequent generations. The delirium increased with age, and most
of the adult natives showed it by eating dirt, sleeping on dunghills,
pummeling anthills with rocks even as the ants bit them severely, and
jumping out of trees onto their heads. This last maneuver caused the
natives to stagger around senseless for days, or simply to lie
unconscious and bleeding in the sun and rain. All these symptoms
together prevented the natives from caring for their personal lives,
and so they lived in deplorable squalor, with their huts falling
apart, and their children and themselves half starved and wholly naked.
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